If you are a graphic designer, you’re supposed to be creative, you’re supposed to dress funky, you’re supposed to have crazy deadlines, you’re supposed to have clients who want the logo bigger and you’re supposed to be used to almost everyone treating your profession as second class pretty-boy work. Male graphic designers – at least in the country I live in – are considered somewhat of a joke – obviously always behind their backs. Female graphic designers are supposed to the “homely” kind who aren’t supposed to protest when a male client asks them over for a meeting and proceeds to invite them to Lonavala for a weekend getaway. They’re supposed to smile meekly and say yes while accepting the cheque.

If you’re getting married, you’re supposed to be doing the Big Fat Indian wedding. The seven circles round the so-called sacred fire, the traditional 9-yard long sari, the choreographed sangeet – one from the groom’s side and one from the bride’s side, the reception with nothing less than a 1,000 people on the guest list, the alcohol on the menu, the exorbitant wardrobe shopping for not only the bride and the groom but the immediate family – stocked with designer couture that they will wear only once. INR 62,000 for a Ritu Kumar lehenga to be endured [ you can't wear it without scratching and cutting and bleeding your skin in hundreds of places because of the ridiculous zari work and other embellishments ] for precisely two to three hours on the day of the wedding.

You have to be fucking kidding me. She’s never EVER going to wear it again. And don’t go on about how it’s a sacrifice for the most important day in your life. I’m divorced. I know how important that day is. And I’d much rather invest the INR 8,00,000 that the parents insist on spending on ONE day of the wedding into some mutual funds or just fucking put it in a simple bank account or fixed deposit – it’ll take care of the rent for the next +4 years. Wouldn’t parents be happier if the bride and groom can live peacefully for four years without having to worry where the rent’s coming from? Especially when the parents themselves had no money when they got married and were turned down by so-called family when they wanted to borrow money to purchase a refrigerator?

A thousand people will come for the reception, eat like pigs without any appreciation for the food because as the hosts, we would not have paid any attention to the food ourselves. When there’s a thousand mouths to feed, you don’t think about how many spices you can taste in the food – you tell the caterer to cut costs and kaam chalao. The next morning all that food is anyways going to be flushed down the toilet.

Just because it is tradition and a billion other people follow it with their eyes, ears and mouths closed, does not mean it’s right for me – or right for them either. But I’m not really concerned about the billions. I’m concerned about me. When law and order cannot prevent the rape of a woman on the streets in the national capital city, what fucking right does anyone have to pressure me into what career I can choose or how I can get married or what car I can drive and what clothes I can wear?

I love my family but in no way does that mean that I have to be their clone. If they expect that, they should get their heads checked. I do as I please and I live for me. Just as they did and continue to.

Special Marriage Act allows any two individuals to marry (including intercast marriages), irrespective of their religion, caste and nationality. It even applies to people living abroad, with Indian nationality. Therefore, any marriage under the Special Marriage Act is a Civil Marriage by registration. However, there are some conditions to be fulfilled under this act.

Neither party should have a living husband or wife.
Neither party should be a lunatic or insane.
The bridegroom should not be less than 21 years of age whereas the bride must be 18 years old.
The parties should not be involved in any prohibited relationship.
Both parties should be the citizens of and domiciled within the territories mentioned in the Act.

Marriage Ceremony

Notice must be given by the bride and bridegroom to the Marriage Officer of the district, with one of them residing immediately previous to the notice for atleast 30 days.
Marriage Officer records the notice and sends a copy to the Marriage Officer of the District.
30 days time is given for any person to raise any objections to the intended marriage.
From the date of receipt of any objections, the Marriage Officer should enquire into the same, within 30 days.
If the objections are found valid, either party to the intended marriage may appeal to the District Court, whose decision shall be binding.
In case there is no objection or the objection is rejected, the parties with 3 witnesses sign in presence of the Marriage Officer, declaring they are unmarried and are not related within prohibited degrees.
The marriage is then solemnized in any form which parties choose to adopt. The form must have the following declaration by each party to the effect; “I take thee to be my lawful wife (or husband).” The parties and 3 witnesses then sign the certificate of solemnization. This certificate is conclusive certificate of solemnization.
The solemnization should be completed within 3 months from the date of notice, failing which the notice lapses and a new notice needs to be issued.

The much awaited Nikon D90 will be in my hands on the 5th of January and I’m looking forward to 2009 being the year of photography for aside.in as well as for me, personally.

Madhur pointed me to this article about The Luck Factor. While we all know this ‘information’, we nonetheless need reminding.

I am also busy gearing up for the get-together being organized for my batch mates on the 14th of February, Saturday, 2009 [ The Army Public School, Dhaula Kuan, Batch of 1997 ]. I’m hoping we will be able to kick up more activity on the Taps97.com blog.

A lot needs to be done on the new venture front of Protoface. It still shows only one model’s profile and portfolio. Another model has signed up but I have not had the chance to work on his photographs and put them on.

I still haven’t been paid by the guys at Leo Adventure Sports and I’m close to taking down the website. This is the first time I am writing about this publicly – and I’m not hoping for any reactions from both the guys who run that establishment : Aadil Behbahany and Aklesh Poojari.

My “This Diary Will Change Your Life 2009” starts from the 29th of December 2008 – hence I was more than thrilled to declare my New Year already started when I woke up this morning. [ I'll wake up tomorrow morning and shoot a photograph of the cover of the diary. It's 6 a.m. in Gurgaon and I need to be asleep! ]

Happy New Year 2009! [ The change in design on this blog makes me want to write more often. Here's looking forward to a bloggin 2009 - hop I can make the posts varied and hence, relevant to the readers. ]